Understanding Marital Rape, and Why it Persists

Historically, rape has been conventionally described as non-consensual sexual intercourse with a female that is not the criminal’s wife. The notion of a woman irreversibly and unceasingly pledging her consent to sexual intercourse with a male through a marriage contract is quite appalling. Unfortunately, this outdated notion is not only still around but also has even been adapted into actual official law in some parts of the world.

Marital rape is an appalling violation of women’s rights affecting countless women all over the world especially in developing and underdeveloped countries. Hence, even though it’s a very difficult and uncomfortable topic to talk about, the discussion needs to happen in order to start the process of establishing means of helping survivors and protecting potential victims.

Marital Rape Exemption Law and its Implications

Far from criminalizing the despicable crime, Bangladeshi law actually explicitly exempts marital rape. Section 375 of the Penal Code states that “ “sexual intercourse by a man with his own wife, the wife not being under thirteen years of age, is not rape.” It is mentionable here, Bangladesh has the fourth-highest rate of child marriage in the world.

This terrible law is actually contradictory to several other terrible laws. Section 375(2) states that a girl under the age of 14 cannot consent to sexual intercourse. Section 376 sets the age of consent to twelve.

Now, we can scrutinize and analyze how exactly these laws are inconsistent with each other but really, it’s very apparent that all of these need a serious and immediate reform which unfortunately does not seem to be happening anytime soon.

Historical Roots of Colonial Law

The root of this colonial law can be found in 17th century England. Sir William Hale, Chief Justice, said “The husband cannot be guilty of a rape committed by himself upon his lawful wife, for by their mutual matrimonial consent and contract the wife hath given up herself in this kind unto her husband, which she cannot retract.”

Since then, Britain itself and many countries that had been colonized by Britain have gotten rid of this law. All 50 states of the US had introduced some form of a law criminalizing marital rape by 1993. This is an impressive step forward from just 30 years ago when none of the states had such a law. So, we really can’t transfer all of the blame to our colonizers. Bangladesh needs to start acknowledging the severity of the situation and commence the process of recovering from its colonial hangover.

Theories of Marital Rape

Scholars have attempted to use several theories over the years to try and explain the causation and social normalization of marital rape. Among these theories, feminist theory, social constructionism, and sex-role socialization are the most prominent.

Feminist Theory

According to this theory, marital rape is a medium used by men to assert domination and control over women. Feminist scholars use terms such as “patriarchal terrorism” and “license to rape” to describe men using the patriarchal family to methodically inflict violence on women in an effort to control them.

Social Constructionism

This theory suggests the present perception of marital rape was shaped by historical laws. According to the concept of “separate sphere”, since women were almost entirely ostracized from the political arena, the public policies and laws came to biasedly reflect the interest of men.

As mentioned before, since women were viewed as property of their husbands, marital rape is seen as somewhat less violent than “stranger rape”.

Sex-role Socialization

The binary gender-role behaviors that men and women are indoctrinated into impacts the sexual interactions between them as well. Males are taught to be dominant, powerful, and sexually aggressive while women are taught to be tame, fragile, pleasing, and subservient. Marital rape is theorized to be an extreme case of sex-role socialization.

Types of Marital Rape

It may seem a bit odd to categorize marital rape at first glance but it’s actually very important to get the definitions right for effective identification, prevention, etc. Marital rape is divided into two categories by most scholars: non-physical sexual coercion and threatened or forced sex.

The first type, where the perpetrator abuses social power or personal intimacy, is often disregarded which creates obstructions to justice.

Statistics

Marital rape research face similar obstructions as does that of other types of sexual assault.

Many victims are unable to identify themselves as a victim and researchers often differ in their definitions. Therefore, although 10-15% of women in the US are estimated to have been subjected to marital rape, this number may have been grossly underestimated. Even by this estimate, 1.5 million women were estimated to be a victim of marital rape in the US in the year of the nation-wide study. In developing and underdeveloped countries this number can be easily estimated to be dramatically higher.

It’s practically impossible to find these numbers for Bangladesh as the country is yet to even begin acknowledging marital rape as a concept.

Risk Factors

Non-sexual marital aggression

According to the NVAW survey of 2003, both sexual and physical violence in the early stage of marriage has been strongly related to repeated assault throughout the coming days. Additionally, another research has found that psychological abuse by a partner is highly likely to be early signs of coerced sex (which is rape) and physical aggression is positively co-related with forced and threatened sex, both of which are rape.

Who are most likely to become perpetrators?

Hypermasculinity, unemployment, alcohol abuse are some of the characteristics often found in marital rape perpetrators. Hypermasculine men have been found to be normalizing marital rape under the label of “wife’s duty” and some even enjoy it more. Perpetrators of marital rape are significantly more likely to have been witness to violence between their parents. Age is not a significant factor in this issue as men of both young and old age have been determined exhibiting indifferent likelihood of becoming a perpetrator.

Who are the most vulnerable?

Studies have found that marital rape is mostly unrelated to the demographics the victims belong to. However, the correlations between victimization and a few basic demographic characteristics suggest women belonging to certain demographic groups face higher risks of marital rape than others. For example, age, economic position, ethnicity are significant factors in determining the risk women face from marital rape. Younger women face higher risks of being subjected to marital rape than do older women. Similarly, women who are not economically strong, and also those who belong to minority groups are more endangered than their counterparts. Women who have faced sexual aggression from family members at a younger stage of life are more vulnerable to marital rape than women who haven’t.

Why you should always ask for help

An unfortunate number of women struggle with taking a step in getting help even after acknowledging their sexual abuse. The victims fear retaliation, abuse, shame, embarrassment and even hurting their partners by whom they had been subjected to abuse. Some, of course, hesitate whether to identify marital rape as a serious offense due to its mass normalization. A large number of women even find it difficult to resist fearing infliction of violence, damaging the relationship, etc.
Women who do not seek help after being subjected to sexual assault by their partners are 3.3 times more likely to experience assault again. Additionally, victims are more likely to ask for help after every assault. Therefore, it is advisable to seek help as early as possible, preferably after the first incidents and social organizations have been proven to be the most successful resource in this regard.

Effects of Marital Rape

Researchers have concluded that marital rape is likely to be more damaging than rape by a stranger. Every aspect of a person’s health, long-term and short-term, physical, and psychological, is critically injured by marital rape. Marital rape victims suffer from depressive episodes, social phobia, PTSD, and many other psychological disorders and problems. Alarmingly, they also face a higher risk of suicide. Their gynecological health is also severely affected as a consequence of surviving marital rape.

Recovery

When discussing any form of sexual assault, recovery is no less important than prevention but it’s sidelined much too often. Considering the unfortunate prevalence of marital rape and the severe consequences victims face, developing and availing specific treatments should be a focus for the authourities concerned. Sadly, that isn’t even close to reality.
Certain treatments such as systematic desensitization, stress inoculation, cognitive-behavioral, etc have been recommended by experts in treating the victims. The main issue, however, is accessibility. The availability of help and treatment is especially scarce, almost non-existent, in developing and underdeveloped countries.

Everyone deserves a loving and nurturing relationship with their loved ones but unfortunately, the reality is often far from that. If you are someone who has faced violence or aggression from your spouse, whether it be physical, sexual, or emotional, it’s important to not consider yourself “tainted” or “broken”. Although it’s often difficult, asking for help is always a good idea whether it’s from a friend, family member, or some organization.

Resources for Bangladeshi Residents

1. Govt Helplines

a) National Helpline Centre for Violence Against Women and Children- 109

b) National emergency services – 999

c) National Health Helpline-16263

d) National Helpline – 333

2. Acid Survivors Foundation Hotline-01713010461

3.Ain o Shalish Kendra (ASK)  Helpline-01724415677

4. Bangladesh Legal Aid and Services Trust (BLAST) Helpline-0175220220 

5. Bangladesh National Woman Lawyers’ Association (BNWLA) Help line-01711800401, 01711800406, 01711800405, 01711800408

6. WE CAN Hotline-01717-582261, 01794-62664

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